Another month! Again! Somehow!

The year started off really strong in terms of wordcount, but it was mostly on nonfiction sorts of things: reflections on last year, intentions for this one, thoughts on the books I read, etc. It hasn't been so strong in terms of fiction writing. I also realized that I needed to scale back my own expectations.

And how did April go?

My only goals were to outline the Cyberpunk AU, and possibly to try and push through on the current original WIP, which I had stalled out on.

I didn't properly outline the Cyberpunk AU, but I did get a couple thousand words of planning written. I have a weird mix of excitement and apathy toward the project as a whole, and I can't quite figure out what to do with that. It's not the "ugh, I hate this idea, actually" feeling that I had with the Angels and Demons AU that I started and then decided to abandon. I do still *like* the idea... I'm just not wildly excited to work on it, or to struggle through figuring out the pieces that I'm not yet sure how to connect.

Part of that may be that I ran into some scope creep with it... Basically, some characters who weren't the focus of the story as originally envisioned are potentially the ones with the most compelling situation. (A group of functional clones, escaped from the facility that created them.) So... suddenly I have two groups of protagonists, rather than my intended protagonists + supporting characters. I think it'd be a better story if it had some focus on that second group, whether that becomes alternating sections of the story or whether that becomes two stories that are parallel to each other... But that's also not what I set out to write. I want a simple project, not one that almost immediately doubled in size. (And yes, I could ignore that, and just go with the original protagonists... but it kind of feels like that undercuts some of the themes of the story itself in a way I don't care for.)

I did not push through on the other WIP, though I haven't quite conceded. I don't consider it "back burnered" or anything just yet.

Goals for May:
- try again to push through on the WIP
- continue considering the Cyberpunk AU
- look into the snowflake outlining method again; maybe start using it to start an outline for the Worldhopping Fairytale Monstrosity fic

Goals for June and beyond:
- finish the first draft of the current WIP
- outline the second iddy original story
- start the outline for the WFM fic
- find a fanfic idea that I can actually work on and complete
- second draft of the current WIP

I'm still really frustrated at how little I've done this year, but it just isn't translating to actual progress on any of it. I've tried starting a few different projects between last year and this year, and just lose interest almost immediately. (At least the current WIP I'm stalled in, I made it close to halfway.) I have tried a couple times to push through the disinterest, but haven't "broken through" it on any of them, so it just seems like my enjoyment wanes more and more, until I don't even want to think about writing!

I don't know what the culprit is...
If I just picked the wrong projects to try for, then I should probably return to the idea lists and see if any others are more appealing.
If instead it's just that current events of the world are getting to me too badly, and no project is going to be something I can enjoy, then it's probably better to stop pushing.
Bleh.